I cannot tell you how low my lowest point is, but this time could be it. Psychologically, I'm a very internally motivated person. I've kept going on in life because I've been self-motivating myself and usually I never need anyone's support to make a choice or to get through things in life. I thought this was a good thing because that makes me independent and somehow a little stronger because I don't need anyone else. But this time I see the downside. It's so hard to get up again after someone or something has let me down, and the pain is heart-wrenching, and it hurts way too much that it's getting unbearable so the tears can't even start to roll down. Now I know I'm not as strong as I thought I am, or maybe I am, but someone is stronger than me (because there will always be someone better than me, just like there's still a sky above the sky, though I'm not sure about the sky part). I've been hated and hating before, but hate is a strong word I never actually mean to say when I said it. You should remind this: Hate is a strong word; don't use it just to make yourself feel so powerful. Power didn't come from you looking at people from below your nose; it comes from you feeling so small in front of them but you manage to overcome that fear and make them listen to what you have to say.
You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life. -Winston Churchill
So what I do, I take some time alone and alienating myself from the world. I'm so good at being anonymous.
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